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Audiobook Reviews
Also, if anyone is wondering where to get your hands on these audiobooks don't bother torrenting them...PM me. ~.^
Reviews Audiobooks
The Sin Eaters:
Non-Spoilery Synopsis: A body washes up on the shore, covered in thousands of tiny cuts. When Gwen, Ianto, and Jack discover what created the cuts, they uncover a threat to Cardiff
Janto Rating: 5/5 Stars. Lots of time with them alone together, bickering, joking, and fooling around. Jack thinks to himself about how much he needs Ianto, and there is even a brief post-coital scene at the very end. Gwen even has some thoughts about their coupley-ness, which was cute.
Plot Rating: 3/5 Stars. The whole “sin eaters” theme I think might be a bit over-done, but the aliens were interesting enough, and there was quite a bit of action going on. The way to defeat the aliens was kind of predictable, but I learned a lot about the Hub and SUV that I didn’t know before, so that was neat.
Overall Rating: 4/5 Stars. Of course, all the Janto time pleased me greatly, and GDL reading it just made everything 10 times funnier.
Favorite Moment(s): (Remember, read this in GDL’s voice) “But now he [Jack] had some Ianto time: his favorite way to spend an afternoon. Those suits. That hair. That filthy mind. So well concealed behind his polite exterior.”
“’Jack!’ Ianto was holding his hand. He kissed him. ‘You okay?’ ‘Yeah. Come here, you.’ He gave Ianto a massive hug. He needed him. Sometimes more than he’d like to admit.”
The fact that Jack’s boat is called “the Sea Queen”. I mean…come on.
“Gwen couldn’t tell if Ianto was more confident because he was having regular sex, or because he was having regular sex with the boss. Either way, she wasn’t sure whether he was ready to have the mickey taken out of him yet.”
“’Still Ianto, at least this means we get to cuddle up in the back seat.’ ‘Oi!’ Rhys protested. ‘None of that in my car.’ Jack exchanged glances with Ianto. They had been told.”
Also, the whole SUV-James Bond-Ianto moments. Just, just go listen to it. It’s fantastic.
In the Shadows:
Non-Spoilery Synopsis: A man disappears and reappears dead two days later…and sixty years older. The entire Torchwood team investigates, but is thrown off when Jack becomes trapped in a terrible place.
Janto Rating: 4/5 Stars. There was a lot of Jack-needs-Ianto moments in this one that were incredibly sweet and sad. And if you’re interested in Jack’s thoughts on love, him, and Ianto, you get an insight into all of that in this one ^.^ You also get to see how much Ianto is willing to do for Jack, which is really sweet as well. I’m generally a sucker for “Ianto has to save Jack and is upset” scenarios, so this pushed all my good buttons. The only reason it’s not 5 stars is because SPOILER ALERT Jack kills Gwen in his hell before Ianto, which pissed me off. I mean, if it’s his hell, I figure he should kill Ianto first, yeah? END SPOILERS.
Plot Rating: 4/5 Stars. I liked the plot quite a lot actually. Had a good Twilight Zone sort of feel to it, but more evil and sadistic. SPOILER ALERT: The “Ring Around the Roses” singing got kind of old and annoying after a while – I mean, I get it, but just…stop – but other than that it was really engaging, especially to see Jack’s hell and all, what he feared most and all that. Also weirdly heart-warming, to see that Ianto makes out with other boys in his hell. END SPOILERS.
Overall Rating: 4/5 Stars. Liked this one a whole lot for the Janto stuff, and for the plot too. Eve did a fun job reading it; at first I thought I might dislike having her read Janto stuff, but I found her quite lovely. The only thing that I count against it was that it didn’t inform me of Torchwood stuff I didn’t otherwise know, like The Sin Eaters did. Plus the spoiler-thing I said under the Janto rating.
Favorite Moment(s): “’Ianto?’ He kept running, trying to find the one person he knew would help him, the one person who was even close to understanding him. … He was going to find Ianto Jones, and everything would be okay. He’d help him. Ianto loved him, he’d forgive him. He’d rescue Jack from the shadows.”
SPOILER QUOTES:
“Jack looked up at the man he…the man he loved…” [he=Ianto, obv.]
“He’d liked television. He could see himself watching it on a Sunday morning with…someone. Ianto someone. He’d liked Ianto.”
“Then he’d seen the angel. He’d looked like a man in a suit. A handsome man, in a nice suit. [I actually really love how Eve said that line.] A man who then kissed him gently. He stared at the angel and tried to speak, but the angel shook his head. ‘It’s okay. I’m here.’ The angel took Jack’s hands, and held them tight.”
Okay obviously I just loved basically all the Janto moments when Jack was in hell. It made me very, very happy ^.^
Hidden:
Non-Spoilery Synopsis: A series of too-coincidental deaths lead the authorities to believe Jack is behind them. The Torchwood team must solve the mystery to clear Jack’s name, and in the process, unravel a centuries-old conspiracy.
Janto Rating: 1/5 Stars. Almost no action until the very end, though it was a sweet moment. There was some frantic Jack’s cell phone-dialing on Ianto’s part, which was kind of cute. Still, not nearly enough interaction or anything.
Plot Rating: 2/5 Stars. Very action-filled: there was a moment in the middle involving Ianto that was terrifying and sad, and several other action moments for Gwen and Owen. However, I called the ending from at least half-way through, and I wasn’t even really paying attention. The subject matter was kind of fun, but not very redeeming.
Overall Rating: 1/5 Stars. Just didn’t grab my attention or anything, no reason for me to go back and re-listen to it, yeah?
Favorite Moment(s): “Ianto lay propped up in bed as Jack walked into the room. ‘You gave us one hell of a scare, there.’ Jack said, leaning over and kissing him softly on the forehead. Ianto opened his eyes, and smiled.”
Everyone Says Hello:
Non-Spoilery Synopsis: What starts out as an overly-friendly morning turns out to be the precursor for chaos. The Torchwood team must figure out what is causing the citizens of Cardiff to turn into a bunch of “Hello” zombies.
Janto Rating: 0/5 Stars. Come on, you have a bit where Jack is confessing random secrets, and you don’t throw some Ianto-related facts in there? Cut out some of that 12 minutes of annoying plot-snapshots in the beginning and give Jack 2 or 3 minutes to say some amusing, Ianto-related or Jack-the-space-whore-related facts. I mean, come on!
Plot Rating: 2/5 Stars. The plot wasn’t necessarily bad, it was just over-wrought. I didn’t need 3,000 different flashes of how the “Hello” deal was affecting the city, I got it after the first 10 anecdotes. I mean, there was 12 straight minutes of it at one point, and that wasn’t even the entirety of it. Also that cop, Pratt, was just really annoying. Side characters are kind of hit-and-miss with Torchwood, but this one was definitely a miss. I would have much rather just seen Andy there. To the author’s credit, it did get kind of creepy at parts, but that just might be because I was listening to it on headphones at 3 am.
Overall Rating: 2/5 Stars. Burn’s cockney accent was not terribly annoying, so that’s good. I thought I might get really irritated with him early on, but it was fine. Now, the story itself was actually pretty good, but since there was no Janto, I was upset and irritable. But if you want a decent story, this was pretty good/creepy. But if you’re looking for Janto, don’t bother.
Favorite Moment(s): ? None?
ASP apparently = police baton
Overall random observation: Every single Brit actor pitches their voices higher when they’re reading Barrowman’s parts. I don’t know if that says something hilarious about what they think of Barrowman or Americans, but it’s awesome.