Pharmacy

[amuly]

Title: Pharmacy
Pairing: Donny/Utivich
Word Count: 570
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Donny discovers something helpful in a pharmacy in France.
Warnings: none
A/N: So, thought this prompt up drunk one night, but it made me giggle so I typed it up. Also, can you tell I’ve been trying to quit smoking?

            “Holy fucking shit, no way!” Donny shoved past Stiglitz and Wicki, to a small stand in the corner of the pharmacy. His eyes lit up as he grabbed the glass bottle. “They got KY Jelly in France?”

            Several of the Basterds milling around the store snickered. Aldo moved forward, snatching the bottle out of Donny’s hands and setting it back on the shelf. “Lower your voice. You want to wake up the whole damn town?”

            Donny shrugged with casual cockiness. “Eh, no one’s waking up. And lay off the KY!” He snatched the bottle back up, pocketing it.

            “What do you need KY Jelly for, Donny?” Hirschberg said over his shoulder. He was helping Omar pack medicine into a bag, sorting through what they could use and what they couldn’t. Another round of snickering went through the Basterds: all except Utivich, who was in the back, face slowly turning brighter and brighter red.

            “Eh, what the fuck you need to know for, Hirschberg?” Grinning madly, he started thrusting his hips. “Least I’m getting something othah than my right hand. More’n you can say.” Donny was slowly, but not-so-subtly, making his way over to Utivich in the back of the store. Utivich, for his part, was trying to move away from Donny. Their awkward shuffling didn’t go unnoticed.

            “Suppose Uti can say the same, huh?” Another round of snickering went through the Basterds. Aldo cleared his throat meaningfully, gesturing at the shop.

            As he spoke, he clicked open his tin. “If ya’ll are done horsing around, you can pack up and get out.” He sniffed loudly, drawing the tobacco up into his nose. “Don’t need the locals taking notice.”

            With that, the Basterds started grabbing their gear. Donny and Utivich were two of the first out, while others, like Omar and Hirschberg, finished grabbing the rest of the medical supplies.

            “You shouldn’t have done that, Donny,” Utivich grumbled, taking out a pack of cigarettes. He tapped down one of them, examining the compactness of the tobacco before lighting it. At Donny’s hand gesture, he sighed, passing over the lit cigarette and extracting a second one for himself.

            “What? I’m doing you a favah. Now we can fuck without your ass being so sore all the time.” He grinned toothily at Utivich around his cigarette.

            Utivich turned bright red, ducking his head and glancing back at some of the other Basterds who were milling around. “Fuck, Donny, shut your big mouth.”

            Rather than back off, Donny slung an arm around Utivich’s shoulders, breathing smoke into his ear as he spoke. “Hey, come on. I did something nice, right?” He curled his arm around the front of Utivich, drawing his cigarette to his lips. After a long inhale, he moved his hand back to Utivich’s shoulder. The smoke puffed from his mouth as he spoke. “Come on. I’m looking out for you.”

            Utivich sighed, extracting Donny’s arm from his shoulder. “I know. Just,” he glanced around, “could you be less loud about it?”

            Donny snorted. “Not like everyone doesn’t know. Wicki! Did you see what I got?”

            As Wicki walked past, dragging on his own newly lit cigarette, Donny waved the bottle of KY Jelly at him. He kept walking, nodding sagely. “Now you won’t have to steal cooking grease from me and Stiglitz.”

            Next to him, Utivich inhaled sharply, then erupted into a coughing fit. Donny slapped him on the back, laughing.  



Comments

[purpletune.livejournal.com]

Pfftft!
THIS WAS AMAZING

[amuly.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[purpletune.livejournal.com]

No problem :)

[jh-july001.livejournal.com]

XD
aw! Donny and his big mouth!<3
I love that little hint of Wicki and Stiglitz at the end there!

[amuly.livejournal.com]

Hehe Glad you liked!

[hab318princess.livejournal.com]

don't know who they are, but that last line is a winner :D

[amuly.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah, Wicki and Stiglitz, my other ship in this fandom. They're two German-speaking members of the Basterds.

[hab318princess.livejournal.com]

Oh gut.

[keepmeturning51.livejournal.com]

sadhshdfsaf HAHAHA WICKI IS SO SLY ;D I loved this

[amuly.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha, thanks!. Wicki = awesome.