Pray the Gay Away: Chapter 9

[amuly]

Title: Pray the Gay Away: Chapter 9
Pairing: Sirius/Remus
Word Count: 2,118
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Remus' parents send him to a Christian camp designed to help him control his “Same Sex Attraction”. Once there, Remus finds himself rooming with the devilishly handsome bad-boy, Sirius Black. Will he give in to temptation? Could the attraction he feels for Sirius be more than physical? Non-Magical 1970s AU
Chapter Summary: Remus decides he's probably okay with this whole gay thing; Sirius gets a mysterious paper bag from James.
Warnings: none
A/N: I meant for the next chapter to be part of this one, but it became so unwieldy that I had to split it up. That's also why this took a little while – I was writing the next chapter, too. Expect that one up tomorrow morning. Total chapter count is now revised to 12 + an Epilogue, it's looking like.

Previous Chapters:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

 

 

The next morning, Remus had a moment of blissful happiness upon awakening, before the aches and pains set in. “Ow,” he whispered as he rolled onto his back. Between one blink and the next, Sirius' face was hovering over his, gazing concernedly down at him.

“Are you okay? Do you need... what do you need?”

For one moment, Remus' stomach flipped sickeningly at the thought of what they had done the night before. His hands on Sirius, Sirius' lips on his... Remus shook himself quietly in the face of Sirius' earnestness.

Soft fingers brushed at his hair. “Are you okay?” he asked again.

Remus took a breath, trying to make sense of the myriad of emotions running through him. Sirius' sincere concern – and the way Remus' breath caught and heart ached staring up at his face – made the decision for him. He nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.” Sirius' expression was skeptical, so Remus smiled and returned the gesture: reaching up and threading his fingers through Sirius' silken hair. “I'm okay, really.”

Sirius' eyes turned mischievous. “Okay enough for a morning snog?”

Mock-considering, Remus narrowed his eyes. “Maybe...just a little one.”

When Sirius' lips pressed against his, Remus sighed, opening his mouth to him. At the first touch of tongues, Remus pulled away, wrinkling his nose. “Morning breath.”

Sirius laughed, bumping their noses together before pressing a kiss to Remus' forehead. “Okay: no more snogging until after brushed teeth.”

Gingerly Remus lifted himself from the bed, stretching and get a feel for range of movement. His bruises ached more than the day before, now that they had set for a night. Sirius helped him get into his trousers and trainers, while at the same time trying not to be overbearing: hovering by Remus' bed, then backing up to his and fiddling with the bedsheets. Remus frowned as he saw a glint of silver under Sirius' pillow. “What's that?”

Sirius turned to follow Remus' gaze, then blushed. He tugged the chocolate wrapper from under his pillow and held it out to Remus. “You're out of chocolate. I wanted to make sure I knew your favorite brand. You saved this one for last, so I figured...”

Now it was Remus' turn to blush and look down. No one had ever taken that sort of interest in him before. He didn't even think his mom knew his favorite brand of chocolate. But Sirius had figured it out just by watching him for a few weeks.

They walked to the latrines together, shoulders brushing as they did. Briefly Remus was overcome with the urge to hold Sirius' hand, but seeing the counselors beginning to waken, quickly stamped out the emotion. As they brushed their teeth, Remus kept seeing Sirius' eyes flicker to him in the mirror. On the third or fourth time, Remus caught his eyes and held them in the mirror. The boys grinned around their toothbrushes.

“I thought,” Sirius wiped at the back of his mouth after spitting into the sink, “I thought you might freak out. It was sort of your first time, I mean, except...”

Remus blinked and shook his head, before spitting into the sinking. “No it wasn't.”

“What?”

“Why do you think I'm here in the first place?”

Sirius leaned forward, puzzled. Remus took the opportunity to hop up onto the counter next to the sink. He held out his hand, and Sirius stepped easily between his legs, hands rubbing at Remus' thighs. “I thought you snogged someone, but...”

“I had a... we... you know.” Remus couldn't meet Sirius' eyes. “Off. Together.” Visions of a warm spring day and a newly-melted creek flashed through Remus' mind. Their teeth were chattering from dipping into the still too-cold water, but their bodies heated against each other. Afterward, they had been so warm and languid that they didn't move, preferring to bask in the glow of their youthful happiness.

Remus' father had come across them a few minutes later.

“How much did you...”

“Just that.” Remus smiled at him. “Just the once. And it was just... rutting. You know.”

“So you've never done...”

“Anything else.”

Sirius' eyes took on a wicked glint. His hands moved more firmly of Remus' thighs, rubbing and kneading at the muscles there. “Wanna try something else right now?”

Remus' breath quickened as he watched Sirius' fingers walk their way up his thighs and to his belt. His eyes were wide, and completely focused on Sirius' lips, which the other boy licked lasciviously. Oh. Oh.

“Hey Sirius. Hey Remus.” Remus jumped in his seat, pressing back against the mirror. Sirius didn't move from out from between Remus' legs, though his hands dropped from Remus' thighs to his sides. John was holding his bathroom kit awkwardly in the doorway. “Um... should I... come... back?”

Remus made the decision for the both of them, sliding off the counter and pushing Sirius gently away from him. “No, no. Sorry, John. We were just finishing up.”

Sirius' hand slipped into Remus' just before they left the bathrooms. The soft squeeze before his hand was released made Remus feel warm inside for the rest of the day – aching ribs and stinging back relegated to a back corner of his mind in deference to that feeling.

**

Remus marveled at the sensation of Sirius' hand in his. As they walked through the forest in the pre-dawn light, he grinned at the feel of Sirius rubbing his thumb against his knuckles, and the way their arms swung in tandem. He had never done this before: walked while holding a boy's hand. He chanced a glance over at Sirius, who he was pleased to see was staring right back at him, equally large grin on his face.

“We're two big saps, aren't we?” Sirius joked.

A third voice floated down to them from the top of a ridge. “More like a pair of old queens!”

Sirius grinned as he squinted up the ridge. Peter and James were just crossing it, starting on the downward slope.

Suddenly feeling awkward under the gaze of the other two boys, Remus extracted his hand from Sirius', shooting him an apologetic look. Sirius' expression saddened for a moment, but he smiled reassuringly back at Remus. He understood.

As Peter and James drew closer, Remus noticed that Peter was carrying a paper grocery bag, tucked under one arm. Two packs of cigarettes and some lighter fluid – Sirius' usual order – shouldn't require a paper bag. Even a wank magazine to replace the one the counselors confiscated wouldn't require one.

Sirius beat Remus to it, snatching the bag from Peter and rummaging through it, before rolling it shut with a satisfied smile. Remus shot him a look, but Sirius just smiled back secretively and winked. So it was something Remus would find about later, then.

“How you two old queens doing, anyway?” James gave them a knowing look before turning to Remus. “He treating you right?”

Remus shrugged, blushing and looking away. What he and Sirius did was still new to him – it made him skittish to have anyone else to have even the vaguest knowledge of it.

Sirius, thankfully, spoke up for him. “Bugger off, James.”

“That's your and your new boyfriend's job, isn't it?”

Sirius stuck out his tongue and flipped two fingers at James, who perfectly imitated expression and gesture.

Remus coughed and nodded to Peter. “How are things?”

Peter shrugged. “Swear this camp is my parents' way of killing me slowly. They tried to get me to run five kilometers yesterday. I told them they could shove their five-k up their arses.”

Butting in on the conversation, James wrapped an arm around Peter's shoulders. “Yeah. If by 'told them to shove it' you mean 'ran the first kilometer, then collapsed and got out of running the rest'.” He looked at Remus. “D'you need anything? Sirius said he'd pay, and I could get you snacks or drinks or books or something. Sirius tells me you like to read: could get you some Tolkein or something?”

Remus shook his head. His eyes caught Sirius' and he smiled gratefully. The fact that Sirius had been talking to James about his interests sent a little thrill of happiness through him. “I'm fine. Sirius does enough for me: I can't have him buying me books and the like, too.”

“Does enough for you, hm?” James turned to Sirius with eyebrows raised. “You do enough for Remus, do you? Keeping him satisfied?”

“Oi! Just because you can't get any action from that Evans bird doesn't mean you get to make fun of blokes who can.” Abruptly Remus found himself being pulled into a hug, squeezed close to Sirius' side. “Remus and I keep each other satisfied, thanks much.”

Mortified, Remus shoved at Sirius, straightening his shirt from where it had hitched up, and doing his best not to make eye contact with the other boys. “We... we haven't...”

James nodded knowingly, giving Sirius a mock-sympathetic look. “Ah, I see. Haven't managed to dock your cock, have you yet? I suppose Remus hasn't seen it yet, then: if he had, he'd know there's nothing to be afraid of.”

With a growl Sirius jumped James, and the two boys fell into a wrestling match on the ground. Peter leaned against a tree, stretching his legs and groaning. “Have you ever run a five k? It's murder.”

Remus shrugged, still embarrassed over James and Sirius' exchange. “Run a lot on the farm I'm from. Doesn't really bother me.”

To Remus' surprise, Sirius had apparently lunged at James not in defense of his manhood, but for Remus' own honor. “Shut your mouth about him, James Potter! Our love life is none of your business, right? Say it!”

With his face in the dirt, arms pulled behind his back, and teenage boy sitting on top of him, James had little choice but to comply. “Alright, alright! Remus and yours love life is none of my business. Geeze.” Sirius let him up, then, shoving his head into the dirt one last time for good measure. As James stood up, taking off his glasses and cleaning them on his shirt, he grumbled: “Didn't know you two were in love. Blimey.”

Remus could tell Sirius heard it, too, because he tensed suddenly. Remus thought Sirius might try and jump James again, but he relaxed after a moment of indecision, moving to stand closer to Remus. “Alright?”

Remus nodded. “Fine. No worries. I know James is just messing with us.”

Sirius' hand found Remus' and gave it a quick squeeze. “Yeah, but I know you're still nervous about... you know. All this.”

“Honestly, I'm fine.” Remus smiled reassuringly at Sirius. “Though, we should probably head back now. I don't need another run-in with the counselors.”

Sirius' face darkened at that. Turning to James, he pressed some money into his hands and grabbed his cigarettes. The two boys batted at each other good-naturedly, and Remus instinctively knew all was forgiven between them. They said their goodbye's, before both pairs of boys started off in opposite directions to their own camps.

When they got back to their cabin, Sirius immediately slid the paper bag under his bed. Remus frowned, nodding at it. “Aren't you going to tell me what it is?”

Excited grin on his face, Sirius sidled close to Remus, wrapping his arms around his waist and pulling him in. “If I promise you'll love it, and find out tonight, will you wait?”

Remus' stomach flipped at the possibilities. It was too big of a bag from just a simple tube of KY, though that could certainly be one item among many. His eyes widened as Sirius waggled his eyebrows at him. “O-” Remus had to stop and swallow thickly, so his voice wasn't a croak. “Okay. Sure.”

They had to leap apart when the counselor knocked on the door and walked in for morning wake-up. Remus was sure his lips were visibly kiss-swollen, and his face was certainly beet-red. The counselor looked between them, but said nothing besides the time and that they should get ready for breakfast. Remus had to stifle a giggle as Sirius took him into his arms the moment the door slammed shut.

“We've got a whole half hour...”

Remus' bed protested loudly beneath the weight of two teenage boys collapsing onto it.


Continue onto Chapter 10.

 

Comments

[amuly.livejournal.com]

I will say "hurrmmmm" to your speculation... :P